Dads Against the Divorce IndustryDA*DI is devoted to reinstating the societal valuation of Marriage and the traditional, nuclear American Family, with particular emphasis on the essential role of FATHERS. DA*DI offers contemporary reports and commentary on culture; its aberrations and its heroes. |
the Brando rule
Larry Elder
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by Larry Elder
MARLON BRANDO, on the "Larry King Live" show, once used several
racial and ethnic epithets. When a local news outlet rebroadcast
this controversial excerpt, it muted Brando when he used the word
"nigger." His lips moved, but the viewer heard no sound. The station
did not, however, mute the racial epithets Brando used for Italians,
Filipinos, Japanese or Jews.
Call this "The Brando Rule": a condescending, "protective"
standard for blacks.
What does this have to do with the horrific tragedy of Littleton,
Colo.?
Well, as pundits ask why, most quite properly first point to the
parents. Indeed, a recent poll shows that the majority of Americans
blame the parents by a large margin over the other usual suspects --
television, video games, movies, easy access to guns and the
Internet.
Yet, a disproportionate amount of violent crime takes place in
our inner cities. But the media rarely asks, "Where are the
parents?" A typical example. A few years ago, in Los Angeles, a
juvenile court judge found a 15-year-old responsible for the
shooting death of a beloved 82-year-old inner-city grandmother.
The convicted teen had participated in the gang rape of a
13-year-old girl. The girl was then locked in a house, and the
assailants attempted to set it on fire. A neighbor confronted the
suspects, one of whom pulled out a gun. The man dashed in his house,
but his grandmother came out just in time to take a bullet in the
neck. She died in the emergency room.
Read the newspaper clippings of the shooting and subsequent court
proceedings. One article began, "As his mother wept quietly in a
nearly empty courtroom" ... that's it. Who was the mother? What kind
of mother was she? Where was the father? Why didn't he come to
court? How could he have bred such a monster?
These are the very questions we ask about Littleton. But why not
in urban L.A., where youth-against-youth murder is far more common?
Or Washington, D.C.? Or Newark? Or Atlanta? Or Detroit?
Remember Sherrice Iverson, the little black girl sexually
assaulted and killed in that Nevada casino? This happened around 4
a.m., while the girl's father nonchalantly gambled, even though
security advised him several times that they had found his daughter
running around unsupervised. Sherrice was sexually assaulted and
murdered. But when some raised questions about the father's possible
negligent supervision, the Nevada NAACP called such suggestions
racist. And that was that.
Los Angeles County averages about 2,000 murders a year, nearly
half minority gang-related. But, as a nation, do we question the
quality of inner-city parenting? Do we flash anger at the frequency
with which today's teens have children they cannot feed, clothe or
educate? Have we examined the quality of parenting of the black
youths who raped and brutalized the Central Park jogger?
We have a double standard. We hold middle-class, suburban kids'
parents responsible for their children's deviant, criminal behavior.
We do not seem to do the same thing with inner-city parents, a small
percentage of whose kids have gone bad. The failure to apply the
same standard, mind you, is not racism. It is condescension.
A recent article in U.S. News & World Report compared two
impoverished areas outside of Boston -- South Boston, predominantly
white, vs. Roxbury, predominantly black. Both have high levels of
unemployment, approximately the same percentage of children born to
single-parent households and roughly the same number of people
living in public housing. But the violent crime rate in Roxbury is
four times higher than that of South Boston. What explains the
discrepancy? Well, we know that poverty and single-parent status do
not. This sort of leaves values, doesn't it?
The mostly liberal media thinks it's doing blacks and other
inner-city residents a favor by pointing the finger at others. When
a crime goes down and an innocent gets killed, the media blames
Reaganomics, unemployment, poverty, language barriers, lack of job
skills, lack of parenting skills, lack of transportation, too much
TV, and easy access of handguns and drugs. But, as Littleton shows,
kids can get guns anywhere. Drugs, too. And white youths buy more
hip-hop and gangsta rap than do black kids.
What does that leave? The parents. Just as in Littleton. Let's be
consistent. The No. 1 reason for bad kids is bad parenting. Good
parenting does not, of course, guarantee good kids. But to accept
bad behavior from poorer persons of color, while expecting good
behavior from others, is elitist, condescending and damaging. Being
a parent is tough duty. It is a minute-by-minute, hour-by-hour,
day-by-day, week-by-week, month-by-month, year-by-year job. For
adults only. If you wish to read Littleton as a wake-up call for
parents, fine. But make it a wake-up call for all parents. Whether
you live on Park Avenue or Skid Row. Or in East Los Angeles.
Or Littleton. |
Dads Against the Divorce Industry