DADI Blog

Should I Move Out of the Martial Home?

Posted by admin on April 27th, 2006

The question of whether or whether not to move away from your spouse is a big one. It’s depends on what is happening in your home and what its making you feel. All problems can be worked out if given the time and the effort. You have to want to work these problems out. If you are living in an abusive home where you don’t feel safe, you should move out. But if you’re living in a home where there are problems between the people in the house, you should stay and try to work things out. Remember that you have to work on the problems and nothing can ever be solved without trying.

Good communication in the household is the key. You must establish communication.

Choose a time when your household has nothing going on and talk with them. Present to them the problems you see and what you want to see happen to solve the problems. Let them present the issues they see in the house. Try not to argue with them or let them argue. Arguing can and will lead to more anger and even more problems. Open up to everyone and encourage them to do so. Consider counseling for your family if talking around the table does not seem to be going anywhere. It does help to have an educated outside option. Your counselor will identify the problems and help everyone communicate their needs and what they want to come of this. Remember to be honest about your feelings and remind others to do the same.

Nothing can come from an abusive relationship. Whether you are being psychologically, emotionally or physically abused, there is nothing that can come from it but pain and suffering. Possibly you could get hurt or even killed. Abuse is a very controlling way of getting what the abuser wants. They can make you think that you deserve it and have no way out of it. But you do. Call the police if it starts up. Do not hit them back. Tell the police you want them removed from the house. Tell the police what has been happening and show them any marks or bruises they have left on your body. Resort to getting a restraining order on them. With a restraining order they can not come within a certain amount of feet near you. And if they violate the restraining order, they can end up serving time in jail.  You do not deserve abuse and there are ways out!

Moving out of your marital home is a decision that you must make, no one can tell you what you should do. Remember, moving out does not mean that your marriage will end in divorce. Even in cases of abuse, problems can be solved with the help of counselors. There could be an underlying factor causing the abuse such as alcohol or drug addiction. These problems can be worked out if both people love each other and want their marriage to last.

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