DADI Blog

How to Tell your Friends and Family about your Divorce

Posted by admin on April 27th, 2006

It will not be easy to tell your friends and family about your divorce. They might be a little disappointed that your marriage is not going to work out. But they will offer you some support. There is no guarantee to tell how they will react and their reactions will be pretty much unpredictable. Tell the people who you are closest to first, weather it be you brother or some close friends. It’s a good idea to practice what you are going to say to them all first. It is OK to ask for support from your family and friends. They may be insensitive to you for awhile because they’re getting over the loss of your marriage. Divorce does affect every member of a family. If your spouse was not a very good person, they may react happy and be glad that he or she is gone. But if your spouse was good to them they may be torn between both of you. You should encourage them to still talk to your spouse because if you have children, the children could benefit greatly.

At the office you should tell your boss because you will need to take time off for lawyers and counseling. People at the office may talk about your divorce but the best way to handle the gossip that floats around is to ignore it and just state that you do not wish to discuss your personal life at work. You should tell your human resources office because you may be able to receive benefits for counseling. Try to understand that you are very sensitive right now and talking about the divorce no matter the reason, can make you feel unworthy and alone.

If you have children, they need to hear what is happening. They will mostly be concerned with where they’re going to live and where the dog is going off to. They’ll wonder about where their toys will end up, too. Don’t tell them all the details of your divorce. You don’t need to burden them with all the little details. You should try to get them a councilor to talk to. They could really benefit from having someone who knows a lot about kids talk to them about the divorce. The most important thing to remember when talking to your children is to let them know that both parents still love them and the divorce is not something they caused.

Most of all take it easy. This is a very hard time for you and you should take it easy on yourself. It will not be easy but patience and support can make the suffering easy for everyone.

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