DADI Blog

How to Prepare for a Custody Evaluation

Posted by admin on April 27th, 2006

To prepare for a custody evaluation; you must first asses what is best for your children. Ask yourself what would be best for them and not you. It may be hard when you desire your children to stay with you, to look at the situation objectively. Be sure they know that you both love them very much and that you’re just trying to figure out what is best for them. Realize that the court will only do what is best for the child and the child only! They will assess which parent can take care of them psychologically and emotional along with physically. It will not be about you and your spouse’s problems.

A person sent by the courts will come and talk to everyone in the household. They will be trying to asses what is best for the children. But they will be asking you some questions and watching the way you live and act. The best way to go about this is be honest with them and yourself for your kid’s sake. Be sure to let your family speak with them. Your children will have to talk to them at some point so tell your kids that they just want to have a nice chat with them and tell them to be honest. Do not dictate what your kids say.
Talk to your spouse about this and see where they stand. If you know what they’re thinking and feeling you can do what’s best for you children. You will have to talk to them about what is happening and be sure to tell them that both of you love them and they will still have both parents, only living separately. This will be very confusing for them.

Be sure you prepare for the court battle ahead. You want to present yourself as a loving parent and not someone trying to kill their spouse.

Your family will be more than likely involved in the custody hearing.  Do not tell them what to say or ask them to say certain things. It will only backfire on you and hurt you in court. Be sure to tell them to be honest and show them the person you really are good or bad. This is for your children’s future.

Be sure you have a good lawyer and one that you can talk with honestly. You want to prepare for the long road ahead because these assessments can last from 6 months to a year!

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