DADI Blog

Dating after Divorce

Posted by admin on April 27th, 2006

First off, you should be sure you’re ready to date someone before you step out into the dating scene. Be sure you are fully healed from your divorce and are ready to open up to another person. Hopefully, after your divorce you’ve gone through some counseling.

You’ll have a lot of self-doubt and negative thoughts about yourself. You might still be depressed and want to be alone all the time and pine in your old relationship. Sometimes others rebound and get involved with another too fast. Their desperation comes from sadness, guilt and anxiety about being alone. You should really take things very slow and make sure you are ready to dive into another relationship. You have a lot of emotions you’re going through still and it would be better for yourself to recover completely.

You should stay close to your family and turn to them when you are feeling upset, especially around holidays and other special days you should turn to those that will be there for you.

If you are completely ready for a new love, go ahead and start dating. At some point in the date they may ask if you’ve ever been married and it is OK to tell them you don’t want to talk about it right then. But if you are, be sure to tell them what happened in your past relationship. You don’t have to go into details, and you should not be too down on your ex-spouse.  If you have some friends it may be better to go on dates with them instead of trying to date someone new. This way you can get back into the swing of things and start having fun again. They can offer their support and you can start having fun again. Remember you don’t have to have another relationship right away. It will not be healthy if you were to jump into another without getting back to yourself.

If you have children, you have to consider them too. They will wonder what is going on. You should let your kids meet your new friend but don’t push them into liking them. It will take the kid’s time. You children will view your new friend as an invader and they’ll stick to you a lot more than usual. Talk to your kids and see what they think and feel about your new friend. Always remember to express to your children that you are not replacing their other parent with this new of yours.

Just try to seek advice from the ones you trust and take it easy! Believe in yourself again and really sort out what you want in a relationship.

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